Who suits you? Start with the conversation you want

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Do you want to be listened to, led, argued with, intrigued or simply put at ease? That one answer narrows things down far more than a job title does. I sort the shelf this way because temperament is what you actually spend time with, and it is the part a profile tells you most about. The people below are grouped by what their listed personality suggests, which is my reading of it and nobody's promise. Vote in the poll if you like, then go and try one.

If you want warmth or a guiding hand

On a bad day, go to the warm listeners. Amanda Langford, 37, a home stager, heads the group, and going by her profile she will ask the follow-up question most people forget. If you are tired of making decisions, try the page of people with a firm hand on the conversation, where Natalia Vargova, 28, an heiress, and Viola Santoro, 36, an interior designer, will gladly make them for you. These two moods pull in opposite directions, so be honest with yourself about which one you need tonight.

If you want friction or intrigue

Bored by agreement? The sharp tongues will contradict you with pleasure, and Blair Setsuna, 32, a fruit stall seller, is my first choice among them. If you prefer a slow puzzle, the people leading double lives each keep a part of themselves back, as Emily Foster, 28, a law assistant, does behind her corporate job. Friction gives you a quick spark, whereas intrigue takes several evenings to pay off. Newcomers tend to enjoy the first, and patient readers of thrillers tend to like the second.

If you want someone settled

My personal soft spot is the page for those who are older and unbothered. Martine Rochelle, 69, a retired burlesque dancer, and Beatriz Vargaro, 43, a weather reporter, have nothing to prove to anybody, which makes for restful and often funny company. If you have no idea what you want, start there, because easy company forgives a clumsy opening line. And if your first choice bores you after a few messages, do not persist out of politeness. Move along to another mood, as a good shop always lets you browse.